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Monday, October 26, 2009

The Quote Wall

Most college apartments have something called a quote wall. Basically whenever someone in the apartment says something strange, inappropriate, or otherwise hilarious, it goes on the quote wall.
Last year I thought we had a pretty awesome apartment with some pretty funny moments, so I thought I would share a collection of our favorite quotes. Most of these are inside apartment jokes, but they are pretty funny nonetheless.

Most of the quotes come from these primary characters:

Robby - Um...this is me.
Andrew - This is my younger brother and former roommate.
Dave - My best friend and former roommate.
Meagan - Dave's former girlfriend/former fiance/current wife.
Erica - Our good friend and honorary roommate.
Suzanne - One of our favorite upstairs neighbor girls.

With that, here are the quotes in no particular order:

-Robby: "It's not stalking, it's social networking!"

-Dave: "I probably shouldn't eat spicy food on an empty stomach...I think it goes straight to my bum."

-Andrew: "Curse you Babylon 5! You've made us slaves with your intricate story lines and your mediocre mid-90s special effects!"

-Meagan: "Your wallet is boring...there's nothing even decent to steal in it..."

-Robby: "I eat gigabytes(pronounced jig-a-bites) like you for breakfast!"

-Suzanne: "You're mildly lame."

-Erica: "Whoa Dave! You have large appendages!"
Dave: "Why thank you."

-Robby: "I don't think the public is ready for this."

-Dave: "I can't stop it! It's growing everywhere!"

-Nick: "I just don't want my hair to smell like feet."

-Andrew: "The world must have been an ugly place before the bra was invented."

-Robby: "I just got back from a date with an attractive girl. I'm not gay...at this point."

-Brian: "The man told me to eat souls...so I eat souls."

-All: "Fourchachos!"

-Meagan: "Dave, are you alright over there?"
Dave: "I need to fart."

-Robby: "Hmm...I like variety."

-Suzanne: "I really need to get uglier friends."

-Andrew: "The question you should ask yourself Berto is not, 'are these shorts too tight,' but 'is my butt too big.'"

-Meagan: "Don't you dare! Girlfriends are not for shields!"

-Ben: "If you need to escape rape, you can punch them in the ovaries!"

-Robby: "A little too much cheese, a little too much beans, a little too much Cholula, makes a little too much heaven."

-Erica: "I feel like a skank."
Robby: "Why do you think we keep inviting you over?"

-Dave: "I'm going to bed."

-Robby: "If I were a girl I would be a lesbian for sure."

-Andrew: "You can still cuddle with your pillow...you just need to balance your cuddle time."

-Meagan: "I'm glad to hear that all it takes is a hot elf and you turn gay."

-Robby: "You think this is weird? I saw naked babies on Facebook today!"

-Andrew: "It's not sexual if we're related."

-Kira: "Meagan is engaged?! To Who?"
Dave: "Some douche-bag..."

-Robby : "Did I ever tell you about the time I got shot by a rocket launcher while I was riding a razor scooter around the warehouse?"

-Andrew: "Buzz-off Ho bag!!"

1 comment:

Erica said...

Oh those were some good times!!!